.. .: :: Francesca's delirium :: :. ..

Bad news :(
My aunt called yesterday to say that my grandma has to pay a lot of money for the telephone bill. Someone on July 31st made a phone call to somewhere named Wallis and Futuna...Have you ever heard of this place before? Me, never... I wish I had never heard of this name :(
Obviously, the one who used the computer on that date was me. I couldn't connect to Internet during my holidays in Tropea, but before leaving for Trieste my family and I moved to my grandma's house. There's my uncle''s computer in her house. My uncle is the only one who can use it, but he was not at home and my damn hotmail account gets tons of spam every day. I had to check my mail boxes and delete all the spam. The computer has got a old 56K modem and the connection is very slow. I think I checked my mail accounts, my sites and some friends' pages.
I don't remember well. Anyway, the connection was not good and it disconnected several times. Seems that the last time it disconnected, it reconnected with a dialer (I SWEAR I didn't install anything, I didn't visit porno sites, I didn't download cell logos or tunes... but obviously nobody believes me! I am the stupid one, always...). Cost: 2,50 €/minute. A lot of money. And we didn't get the bill for August yet (I connected in August 1st also, before leaving, and I don't know for how long...It took ages to see a web page!)... I think I will have to pay everything. But this is not the worst thing.
I will give my grandma's back the 50 € she gave me as a graduation present and she can keep the rest.
The worse thing is that I have to say my uncle to make sure the dialer is not installed in his PC. All my efforts to hide the fact that I used his PC were useless...Sigh! All the family (uncles and aunts, grandma and my parents and brother obviously) now say I'm a idiot and they look down on me :(
My father is trying not to pay that phone call. But I don't think he will succeed.
He doesn't talk to me except when he insults me. I hate the world in this moment :(
I hate that my relatives, who don't even know how to switch on/off a PC, consider me a stupid being and laugh at me.
The sad thing is that I have always thought that people who install dialers have never seen a computer...Well, I'll never think something like this from now on. I'm so depressed :(

Well, seems I'm not the only idiot in the world. Terrorists made a terrible mistake in my humble opinion. I knew they would kill the Italian hostage. He was an innocent, but from their point of view, the Italian Government is not (everyone who supports the USA is non innocent). Now I am not so sure that terrorists have their own reasons.
I don't want to know what Americans did to make them release the American hostage. I cried for the Italian hostage, and I truly believed that our soldiers should come back. I don't want an other terrorist attack. They will not touch the Pope, but there are innocent people everywhere, like in Spain.
Anyway...What about France? They want to kill 2 French hostages? France never supported the USA in this war, am I wrong? This is crazy!!! I am so cunfused and sad.

Well, are there happy news today? I'm happy for the golden medal of Stefano Baldini at the Marathon. It was a very important competition, and I almost cried for joy. But this is not enough to give this black period a better color :(
I'm trying to write a decent CV and look for companies to send it to. It's not easy with my father who wants to control every word I write :(
I have to survive. There have been worse times. I want to believe that God gives us hard days to make us appreciate happier days.

I have not done much. I'm reading the php manual when I have time. I went to the cinema with my brother to see the 3rd episode of Harry Potter
(I liked it) and I watched the 9th Gate (with Johnny Depp) at home. Honestly, I didn't like it. At the beginning it seemed much much better.
That's all...Back to my job-hunting :(

My parents came back home on August 17th (Anne Claire's birthday!) and I haven't recovered from it yet :) I'm glad they're back...I am eating a lot, I don't do much housework but I miss my freedom a little :) I have not as much spare time as before...But well, instead of complaining I should think of my mum, which is working hard (washing, cooking, cleaning antything, ironing etc. ) and never complains about anything... :)
Today is Cecilia's birthday... I'm waiting for my mum to stop chatting on the phone and I'll call her. I am not a good friend, this is probably the first time I've called her since I know her... Sorry my dear... I am not a fan of mobiles and telephones :) But I am really happy to know you! I hope you'll have a cool party this evening and I wiah I was there with you!
Maria Chiara and Marco arrived in Trieste yesterday. Tomorrow we'll meet downtown and I'll have dinner with them (They will cook some Japanese dishes!). I missed them a lot! But...Maria Chiara will leave for Sicily on Wednesday, and I will not see her until September... mmmh August is not a good month for me!
Thanks God there's my dear good old Anna, tomorrow we'll go to the seaside. The weather is not so hot, but we don't want to accept that Summer is getting over :p
Wow! My mum finished talking on the phone... I'm going to call Cecilia!
By the way, I decided... I want to study php... Is there anybody who can help me when I have a question about it? :D

Oh my! Why it is so difficult to keep a blog updated? Even when you are unemployed and on holiday? Haha maybe THIS is the reason...When you work or study, you are always at your computer :) Iva don't worry, I perfectly understand you :)
Well, my parents will come back home on Tuesday...I'm both happy and worried...Everything is so tranquil when I am the boss at home *LOL* My sister will sleep again in our room (she is sleeping in my parent's bedroom now). I will not be allowed to eat in front of the computer any longer, nor draw and paint all day long...they will remember me every day that I am unemployed...But well, I will not have to wash the dishes, cook, mow to the lawn etc...So, I'm happy anyway hehehe I kinda missed my mum and daddy *smile*
The last days have been terrible. Maria Chiara and Marco are not in Trieste, and the city is a desert...Everybody seems to be on holiday and I am all alone...I hate this period! I hate that Summer is getting over...Sigh!
As you may guess, I spent the last days drawing and painting, writing emails and updating my Garasu no Kamen site. Oh yes, I read a lot of manga! Every month I spend a lot of money...This is the complete list of manga I'm buying every month: Orpheus no Mado, Ace wo Nerae!, Waltz Wa Shiroi dress De, Akuma de Sorou, Tokimeki Tonight, Paradise Kiss and obviously Garasu no Kamen...I love them all, and I don't need to say what my favourite one is :)
I will not talk about war any longer. Again, I am 100% against wars and against our troops there to help the US. I'll stop here, just praying there will be no other terrorist attacks :(
Well, I wanted to do a new layout... I made this one but I don't like it too much...I am to tired to think about a different one, and I wanted to change layout before my parents arrive at home...I don't know if I will have all the time I have now :)
Kisses to all... Goodnight!

Calitoe you're so right :) Now I'm back in the net!
I am thinking of a new layout for this blog, even if I like this one too much :)
I've been to the air show yesterday...I wonder why the weather this summer is so crazy and unpredictable! I stared at the sky from 2.30 p.m. to 6 p.m. in spite of the terribly hot sun (I had neither sunglasses nor cap nor water to drink...) and the rain (I had an umbrella, but I couldn't open it: if I had done it the people behind me would have killed me)...But...the most shows were cancelled because of the rain...Even the final show by Frecce Tricolore :( Well, I have to say that the French Acrobatic Team and the Red Bulls made me dream with their performance...It was worth while anyway!
In the evening there were the fireworks but Maria Chiara felt sick so I watched them from my house ( I prefer watching them downtown, but well, thanks God I can see the Fireworks from my house! I feel very lucky for this!!!).
I'm very worried because of a certain war and I wish our Government made our guys come back home. Maybe I'm a coward and I would do what terrorists want, but I bet 99% of Italians are like me and I didn't forget what happened in Spain :(

OOPS I did it again...I forgot my blog :)
Well, well, well. I got back home in August 2nd. A lot of housework was waiting for me impatiently. The grass turned into a wood in less than a couple of week! Nobody watered, but unwanted plants grew up strong. I almost broke the electric mower. I wonder why my brother who stayed at home is not expected to take care of the lawn...I don't care about it either!
Well, anyway, things are turning into normality...When they are completely OK, my parents will come back and everything will turn back to chaos *LOL*.
I've just spent a very nice afternoon in Postojna cave, Slovenia with Maria Chiara, Marco and Luca. Everything there was too expensive, but I enjoyed it. I almost died because I was half-naked (the temperature here is extremely hot and humidity is high) and there were +8°C in the cave...I spent 1 .30 hour in the fridge LOL
I'm writing while it finally decided to rain! Yahooooo! I hope tomorrow the air will be a little fresher! But...Tomorrow I want the sun! I want to see Trieste Air Show 2004, a wonderful show by Frecce Tricolori, the Italian airforce´s acrobatic squad. I'll pray for the rest of the night..I want to see it :)
What else have I done in these days. guess it..Some days at the sea with Anna and Elisa, one nice only for girls evening at Anna's for Elisa's birthday, a nice evening at the museum with Maria Chiara and Marco. I hope ther will be other occasions like these. I wish this period could last forever :)
There are also sad things that happened to me. I missed a chance which could really change my life...At least, it was one of my biggest dreams...But well, I did my best and I don't think it will help me to go on thinking about it...So there's no reason to write about it...Be positive people, life is short! Enjoy it :)
Izumi, Alice, Paola, Sweety and all the lucky people who are on holiday...Have fun! I hope to hear from you when you are back!!!
In the meantime, I'm updating my good old fanlistings and my Garasu no Kamen page. I'm working hard, and I'm writing a lot of emails to my pen pals :)